Ipar Adalah Maut – Sebuah POV Pelakor

Seperti yang sudah banyak diketahui PELAKOR merupakan singkatan dari Perebut LAKi Orang. Terkesan laki-laki itu sepertinya berupa seonggok benda tak bernyawa, kok bisa direbut?

Siapa sih yang tidak tahu kisah cinta segitiga antara Mas Aris, sang istri sah Nisa dan si adik bontot pelakor Rani. Kisah cinta segitiga yang dibalut dengan apik, bergelora dan penuh tantangan yang mampu mengaduk-ngaduk emosi penonton.

Sekarang kita akan bahas kisah ini dari sudut pandang si Pelakor, pemeran yang di Indonesia sangat dihujat oleh netizen bahkan bisa main hakim sendiri kalau sudah diskusi tentang Pelakor.

foto: IG Ipar adalah maut

1. Rani si anak bontot yang manja

      Di film Ipar adalah Maut, sosok Rani digambarkan sebagai si bontot yang sangat manja kepada sang kakak Nisa dan ibunya. 

Alkisah sejak kecil Rani kehilangan figur seorang Ayah, karena Ayahanda sudah meninggal dunia di saat Rani masih sangat membutuhkan sosok tersebut. Ibunda Nisa dan Rani memilih untuk tidak menikah lagi dan berjuang membesarkan kedua putrinya seorang diri.

Saat sang kakak menikah dan memiliki suami yang lekat dengan sosok Ayahnya dan sangat berperan dalam urusan domestik rumah tangga, membuat Rani menjadi ada hati dengan Mas Aris yang diperankan oleh Deva Mahenra.

Diceritakan dengan keseharian Mas Aris yang berwibawa sebagai dosen di kampus, kesigapan di rumah dalam berperan seperti bermain dengan anak perempuannya, membantu mencuci piring dan memperlakukan istri yang sekaligus kakak kandungnya Nisa dengan sangat baik, akhirnya Rani pun mulai melihat Mas Aris lebih dari sekedar sosok abang ipar.

Terlihat dari mata dan bahasa tubuhnya bahwa Rani ingin memiliki Mas Aris sebagai sosok pelindung yang bisa memerhatikan dan mendampingi hidupnya setiap hari

2. Rani dan minimnya pengalaman asmara

Tokoh Rani yang diperankan dengan sangat ciamik dan lugu oleh Davina Karamoy memperlihatkan bahwa ia belum pernah berhubungan dengan lawan jenis.

Setelah Nisa berkeluarga dan pindah rumah, Rani tinggal hanya berdua ibunda. Mungkin saja hal itu membuat Rani jadi kurang bergaul dan mengenal lawan jenis.

3. Rani dan sifat egosentris

Digambarkan sebagai sosok adik kecil yang egois dan selalu dituruti keinginannya membuat Rani tidak bisa berpikir mengenai konsekuensi dan akibat fatal dari perbuatannya.

Bahkan pada awalnya Rani tidak merasa bersalah sedikit pun dan malah menyalahkan sang kakak karena terlalu sibuk dan kurang memperhatikan suaminya.

Rani selalu mendapatkan apa yang ia mau sejak kecil.

4. 4. Rani dan Aris, keduanya salah

S  Seharusnya di dunia ini tidak ada istilah Pelakor ataupun Pebinor (PErebut BINi ORang).

Pada hakikatnya manusia itu dibekali akal pikiran dan perasaan yang membuatnya tidak mudah diperebutkan seperti barang.

Rani dan Aris sama-sama ingin bermain api dan rasa ingin memiliki yang besar satu sama lainnya. Tidak akan ada yang terpancing jika umpan tidak disambut.

Satu-satunya yang tidak salah adalah Nisa. Tidak bisa dibenarkan jika Nisa yang diperankan oleh Michelle Ziudith disalahkan oleh penonton. Nisa disalahkan karena sibuk bekerja dan kurang        memperhatikan suaminya.

Nisa bekerja dan berwiraswasta juga setelah mendapat restu Mas Aris. Jika mas Aris menganggap  suci pernikahan mereka, teguh pendirian dan setia, maka perselingkuhan itu tidak akan terjadi. Walaupun ia digoda oleh seribu Bidadari.

Nah bagaimana makin penasaran ya buat yang belum nonton film Ipar Adalah Maut. Bagi yang sudah nonton pun jadi ingin nonton lagi kan?.

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Lima Café dekat Stasiun MRT, cocok banget untuk Pejuang WFC

Rasanya udah gak zaman lagi ya untuk selalu kerja selama 8 jam duduk di kursi kantor. Semenjak era pandemi, banyak Perusahaan yang menerap sistem WFH (Work from Home) dan lama-lama berubah menjadi WFC (Work from Café). Terkadang banyak sekali gangguan untuk kerja dari rumah, misalnya bagi yang memiliki anak balita (bawah lima tahun), maka terciptalah tren untuk WFC.

WFC pun juga menjadi alternatif untuk mengganti suasana dan mood kerja, dengan tempat yang nyaman, koneksi wifi yang kencang dan makanan yang enak biasanya menjadi tambahan motivasi dan inspirasi bagi para pekerja.

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Liburan sehari ke Dusun Bambu Bandung: Destinasi wisata hemat bagi warga Jakarta

Musim liburan sekolah adalah masa yang sangat dinantikan bagi anak-anak kita, namun kadang kita sebagai orang tua khawatir jika akan over budget ya. Nah, ini ada pilihan lokasi liburan yang sangat menyenangkan karena bisa hemat budget dengan tidak perlu menyewa hotel ataupun villa untuk menginap dan dijamin akan sangat menyenangkan untuk liburan keluarga.

Cocok bagi warga Jakarta yang sudah bosan untuk jalan-jalan di Jakarta, ada destinasi menarik yang  bisa dicoba, yaitu Dusun Bambu, Lembang, Bandung. 

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Cerita Janda

Halo!

Maaf ya sudah lama banget gak nulis apapun, semoga ada yang nungguin yaaa haha.

Apa yang terbersit di pikiran kalian saat baca judulnya? agak gimana gitu ya? mungkin emang karena segitu negatifnya stigma "janda" di negeri kita. Kalau duda jadi stigma negatif juga-kah? kayanya gak terlalu ya, ini memang subjektif menurut saya aja. Kan website pribadi jadi suka-suka dong mau cerita apa, bayar sendiri juga :p 

Tapi semoga oneday bisa menulis dengan bahan penelitian atau observasi yang cukup kompleks. amin. Saya hampir lupa kalau menulis adalah meditasi yang terbaik untuk saya.

Langsung simak aja cerita singkat saya, semoga bisa menjadi motivasi dan sedikit inspirasi.

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Cerita Lahir (Caesarean Section-Premature 32 weeks)

Halooo bundah-bundih yang budiman..

Pernah janji sama kalian ((ecie ada yang nungguin gak nih?)) untuk share cerita kelahiran dan inilah dia gw persembahkan khusus untuk kalian yang mau mau aja 😋((setelah 17 bulan dari persalinan)).

Due date yang pada awalnya antara 11-15 May maju delapan minggu ke 24 Maret. Tidak pernah disangka, tampaknya disinilah ujian tertinggi dalam hidup gw dari Tuhan.

Sejujurnya emang gak nyangka kalau harus melahirkan prematur karena tidak ada riwayat kelahiran seperti ini di keluarga. Selama kehamilan pun kondisi gw selalu dalam keadaan baik, kenaikan BB gw dan janin oke, tidak pernah mual atau muntah yg bikin gak bernafsu makan, jadi makan gw tuh enak banget selama hamil. Sempat pernah kurang air ketuban tapi setelah catch up dengan banyak minum air mineral, hal itu bisa cepat teratasi.

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Wanita Belum Sempurna Jika Belum Menjadi Ibu

Benarkah? 

Adakah di antara kalian yang mengernyitkan alis saat membaca judul tulisan

Apakah pernyataan itu bisa dibenarkan?

Untuk generasi millenials mungkin sering mendengar penggalan kalimat tersebut ya. Dimana sebagian dari kita sedari kecil sudah didoktrin nanti jika sudah dewasa untuk wajib menikah lalu mengandung, melahirkan, mengurus dan membesarkan anak. Jadilah ia wanita sempurna yang bisa berkembang biak.

Mungkin sebagian dari kita sering mendengar kalimat "buat apa sekolah tinggi-tinggi nanti juga ujung-ujungnya di dapur". Miris ya?

Di dapur pun juga butuh skill khusus lhoh, chef ternama saja punya sekolah khusus dan mayoritas mereka itu pria.

Seharusnya tidak perlu genderisasi seperti itu.

Zaman sudah berubah pesat, wanita bisa menjadi apapun yang mereka mau, mereka punya suara yang patut didengar di rantai kehidupan ini.

Menurut gw pribadi sempurna atau tidak sempurnanya wanita tidak bisa dinilai berdasarkan profesi dan peran. Toh kita semua tahu tidak ada manusia sempurna.
Menjadi Ibu memang tidaklah mudah, selalu ada pelajaran dan tantangan baru setiap hari dan itu bukan berarti mereka menjadi sosok yang sempurna.

Tidak menjadi Ibu bukanlah berarti menjalankan peran hidup yang mudah dan juga bukan berarti mereka menjadi sosok yang tidak sempurna.

Setiap insan memiliki tantangan, ujian dan rezeki masing-masing. Takarannya pasti berbeda. Siapa yang menentukan takarannya? Tentu saja Sang pemilik alam semesta Tuhan Yang Maha Esa.

Semoga ya di zaman ini, dimana gen Z dan Milenial sudah banyak berperan tidak ada lagi celotehan seperti itu. Tidak ada lagi doktrin berdasarkan gender. Terutama dengan stigma perempuan di dapur, laki-laki dimana aja suka-suka mereka. Hehe.

Semoga juga generasi Boomers selalu mau belajar dan update informasi. Berpikiran terbuka memang sangat dibutuhkan di era ini.

Gw pribadi menilai para gen Milenial yang sudah berperan menjadi orang tua, mereka mengasuh anak dengan cara yang tidak dibeda-bedakan. Baik anak perempuan ataupun laki-laki semua harus bisa bekerja di dapur, membersihkan rumah, mencuci baju dll. Karena sebenarnya itu semua kan basic skill untuk bertahan hidup.

Agar mereka terbiasa dan bisa hidup mandiri juga menjadi sosok yang sempurna. Eh canda hehe.

Semakin dicari semakin kita tahu yang namanya sempurna itu tidak ada, manusia tempatnya salah. Mungkin ujian di sekolah dapat 100 itu baru sempurna, tapi namanya manusia selalu akan merasa ada sesuatu yang hilang atau kurang.

Oke sampai sini bisa dipahamin ya kalau sempurna itu adalah fana. Sempurna bisa diganti dengan kata cukup dan syukur.

Saat manusia bisa menentukan kadar cukup dalam dirinya disitulah dia memiliki kehidupan yang berkah dan sempurna versi dirinya.

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My Baby is a NICU Warrior

Today we start the countdown to World Prematurity Day, which will be commemorated on November 17th. As a preemie mother I want to share my story for a memoir and a very tiny little bit of education for preemie parents out there.

My daughter was born on 32 weeks, just like a size of acorn squash. Judged by her gestational age, she was born in good condition and with a great weight which is 1.9kg. I heard her crying very loud when I was still lying on the surgery table and unfortunately I can't see her face at all, because the pediatric immediately brought her to NICU for observation.

My brain can't stop thinking while my obgyn finalized her job to sew up my belly and it made me wide awake. Not because of scared but I just want to watch the doctors perform the surgery, like watching Greys Anatomy but this one is real. Also it can distract my brain from worry about my baby.

Before I gave birth I was hospitalized for almost a week and my Obgyn gave me five dose of Corticosteroids (lung maturity injection). It can make the baby's lung more mature and indeed we better get that injection because the prediction of premature birth. 

I felt constant contraction and it hurt very much, I even can't move my body from lying to sit. Giving birth during pandemic is another story to tell and actually it make everyhting worse.

One day passed-I need to recover from c-section first, such as learn to sit, walk and to make sure that the suture is in well condition. Finally I can see my baby, she is very beautiful, looks firm and strong. Tiny but mighty. They put her in an open box and wrap in plastic, they will move her to incubator if she is more steady. As far as I can see, her skin was so delicate and looks so transparent, just to cover a flesh and a very little amount of fat.

Of course I'm crying the first time I met her but it was a tears of joy. I just feel so grateful to finally meet her and I can see that she is strong and a warrior. Strong like her mama, even more.

As predicted they install CPAP ventilation on my baby, NGT, many IV and a lot of cables that I don't even know the name, all I know those things is to keep my baby alive.

Long short story, the CPAP was unplug on seventh day but I still can't hold her in my arms. I don't know why the doctor don't let me practice Kangaroo Mother Care (KMC) as soon as possible, she seems steady. But yes the pediatrician know the best. So I can't make another pressure.

After a lot of screenings, blood test and phototeraphy, we decided to make a request to hospital management to transfer my baby to government hospital. Because the NICU fee at current private hospital is very expensive. The bill running down like a leak faucet and it almost reach the insurance limit and actually we need pediatrician second opinion as well.

Transfer a NICU baby to government hospital was not an easy process and fortunately we got lucky to transfer her on the same day we made a request. I call my cousin who work at that hospital, asking for help to contact the pediatrician to accept my baby on their NICU and yes it called privilege.

On the new hospital she got a new treatment, she can drank a lot of breast milk from a bottle, start from 10ml per 2 hours up to 20 ml per 2 hours. On the previous hospital she only allowed to drink 1ml per 3-4 hours because of weak digestion. They admit her to Perina room, no more NICU and of course that was a good news.

Eventough I can't meet my baby everyday because of Covid-19 protocol (they update the visitor policy) but I can do KMC on third day. The feeling to hold my baby for the first time after a quite long journey was remarkable. They limit the KMC time to one hour only and it include the time to learn how to do a breast feeding to my preemie baby.

The advantage in the previous hospital is I can visit my baby whenever I want and as long as I want because she was the only patient there. The limit of ventilator machine make they only admit one NICU patient at a time.

Everyday I drop a bags of breast milk to the Nurse and I am beyond grateful because she can drink all of the breast milk and it increase my spirit to pump my breast milk.

Finally the day has come, the day I can bring her home. She spent nine days in the second hospital. Now I can hug her everytime I want and actually it's such a way to caring a preemie baby, it called Kangaroo Mother Care (KMC).

My baby's pediatrician ask me to do KMC 24/7 to keep her warm, to boost her weight (increase her appetite) and they believe it can increase breast milk production as well. Actually, every babies need to get a skin to skin contact, not only a preemie. Because it's their live transition from a warm and safe womb to the world that have a lof of germs and challenge 😂. Baby need to have a smooth adaptation process, don't expect them to be an independent human being in an instant.

I did a research about a preemie, like how to take a very gentle care of this tiny baby, how to feed her and how to control her temperature. Usually preemie baby is too weak to do a Direct Breast Feeding (DBF) because of weak suction, so we use many method to feed the baby like using a cup feeder, SNS system and OGT or NGT. 

On this case I use a bottle so the baby can get more milk and I can catch her correction weight. I need to count how much milk she can take per hour and usually a preemie need additional formula/vitamin to mix in the breast milk which is Human Milk Fortifier (HMF). It really boost the weight of my baby and alhamdulillah we can catch her correction weight just in time. Every baby is different, some may tolerate HMF and some baby just can't take it. She need to consume 18 sachet of HMF per day so I don't have any chance to feed her directly from my breast. She can drink milk directly at four month cronological age and i thinks  it is another time for my relactation story.

For their age, preemie baby has three age:

1. Gestational age, we use this age until 50 weeks.

2. Chronological age, baby actual age.

3. Correction age, following the week the baby was born. We usually use  correction age until the baby reach two years old and three years old for an extreme premature. Correction age as a benchmark for their growth and developement .

To keep in mind, preemie baby need to do a lot of screenings. The most important are:
1. Eye-Retinophaty of Prematurity (ROP)
2. Echocardiography (heart USG)
3. Head-USG to check if there are some blood on the brain, etc. It need to check since born and before the fontanelle closes.

4. ENT-OAE and BERA

5. Blood screening.

On my baby case, she got two screening on the first hospital which is for heart and head. It was a little bit late to know that eye is very urgent and top priority to check. I did the screening on 40 week gestation age and thankfully my baby didn't have any ROP but she got a little thing on her heart and I believe she can make through it. We will continue to do quarterly screening for her heart.

She teach me how to life the live the moment I heard her crying.
She teach me how to survive in the glass box called incubator.
She teach me that there is always silver linings even on the darkest cloud.

My baby girl and any other preemie in the whole world is a true warrior.

She is destined to be greatness.

Preemie parents is not a failure, they are the strongest and the one who really can learn from a mistake. Learn how not to blame all the things to themselves and to accept that everything happen for a reason.

Afterall, every good mother is a strong and brave creature.

This dunya is the field of tests and God promise there is a reward in the afterlife.

So, cherish every moment with your baby. It only happen in very short time. Enjoy while it last mama.

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Ulasan ( Review) Dokter Kandungan (Obgyn) dan Rumah Sakit (RS) di Brawijaya Duren Tiga

Sejak awal mengetahui tentang kehamilan pertama ini, gw memang sudah berencana dan hanya berminat untuk kontrol kehamilan di RS Brawijaya Duren Tiga. Ada beberapa alasan kenapa gw memilih RS ini:

1. Faktor jarak, dekat banget dengan domisili saat ini. Apalagi di era pandemi Covid-19 ini ya bun, rasanya lebih aman kalau pergi ke yang dekat-dekat aja
2. Rekomendasi dokter hasil surfing di google, ada salah satu dokter yang ingin gw coba untuk konsul, yaitu dr. Laksmi Maharani, Sp.OG. *(nanti kita review  lebih lanjut ya bun
3. RS Brawijaya ini cukup punya nama, gw dari dulu taunya yang di daerah Kemang. Cabang di duren tiga dulunya bernama Rumah Sakit Ibu dan Anak Duren Tiga, ganti manajemen pada 7 November 2018.

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The Importance of Counseling With a Psychologist

The Struggle is Real

I understand the situation can be challenging at the moment for some people. We all have anxiety and there is no need to be embarrassed about that. We just need to let our self to accept the situation. Go seek for professional help if you need it. (I believe you all need it ️)

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Pandemi Covid-19 di Jakarta

Lucu yaaa.. Lucu banget negeri dongeng yang penuh drama kumbara ini..

I used to like and voted for Mr. #1

But now I can't even say a thing about him without getting too emotional, angry, disappointed, embarrassed, anxiety and other bad feelings.

I used to ignore and feel sorry for my parents when they bad mouthing about him. But now I realized that I was wrong. We shouldn't get too amazed by him built many infrastructure, it is his job to make this country a great place and it is a crystal clear it shouldn't make him the only great person in this country. I am starting to wonder what is his main and top secret goal actually. Hmm..

In here I have no intention to harm him.

Ini negara kita tanggung jawab kita bersama. Jangan bergantung dan memuja ataupun menyalahkan satu manusia. Sering denger kan kalimat "jangan terlalu memuja dan bergantung pada manusia, pujalah penciptaNya". Jika seorang manusia menggantungkan nasib atau takdir kepada manusia lain, maka rasa putus asa akan lebih dekat dari urat nadi kita.

I'm curious if our country get laughed by other countries or not. I think (and probably what mostly everyone thinking) we need to learn from our neighbour such as Vietnam, Taiwan and even Timor Leste for God sake!!
It is true that some of 'em have the least of citizens, but what they have in common? DISCIPLINE and A GOOD GOVERNMENT/CITIZENS. I understand now why Timor Leste want to be INDEPENDENT!

Jika pemerintah bertindak tegas setegas-tegas nya, maka rakyat yang bodoh ini akan patuh.. Tugas pemimpin untuk bisa memutuskan sesuatu yg bijak dalam hitungan detik. Mana mungkin kita akan borong baju lebaran atau apapun jika departemen store diwajibkan tutup. Di sini saya malu banget sih karena sebagian besar dari mereka cari baju buat lebaran..mau dipakai kemana bro sis? Kalo lebaran masih ada yang open house wah gila sih, no kaleng-kaleng lah sebagian besar warga kita.

Gak mungkin warga berani keluar kalau pintu tol ditutup dan dijaga TNI-AD full with their gear. Airport dan port juga ditutup dan dijaga TNI-AL, tim gegana, tim damkar, tim satgas, tim SWAT, tim CSI (eh monmaap kebanyakan nonton criminal drama).

Padahal sudah ada kisahnya di Zaman Nabi bagaimana cara menghadapi wabah "Jangan kau masuki ataupun keluar dari daerah yang sedang tertimpa wabah". Kita memang bukan negara Islam, hanya negara dengan mayoritas muslim, tetapi pemimpin kami Islam (sejauh yg kebanyakan orang tau), banyak alim ulama, ada MUI.. Tetapi kenapa gak mengikuti ajaran Nabi Muhammad SAW (peace be upon him). Astagfirullah.

source: republika.co.id

Coba kita jadikan renungan, di Asia kita salah satu negara yang termasuk belakangan disambangi virus Covid-19. Tapi kita bukannya belajar cara antisipasi dari negara terdahulu, tapi malah sibuk bikin meme kalo warga +62 kebal Covid-19, sibuk bikin meme "kita gak takut Corona tapi lebih takut banjir", "Corona takut datang karena kita lagi banjir". I am the one who laughed at those dreadful jokes to be honest and I am ashamed of it. Justru Tuhan tunjukkan kasih sayangnya dengan datengin  ujian secara satu persatu.

Ohh come on.. Why destroy our people? our city? our neighbor? Is it possible if all of this theory are the super plan? Why  government didn't do any prevention at the very first place. I AM ANGRY, SCARE AND SAD to find the truth. Truth is always painful but honesty is all we need. I don't believe in white lies.

For now it is useless to regret some things, just find a way to make things better.. Find a solution. Probably lock down the country? Anyone with me? Full lock down for at least two weeks. CUT THE CHAIN.

Don't ever say it can destroy our economy situation. Ada gak ada Covid-19 ekonomi kita emang udh gak jelas. Lock down gak lock down sekarang perekonomian udah gak jelas.. PHK, cuti tidak berbayar, bisnis mulai gulung tikar, itu semua yang dihasilkan oleh PSBB yang membingungkan.. Mau sampai kapan?

Banyak omongan "jangan share yang negatif-negatif gaes, bisa ngerusak imun". Oh sorry justru gw ngerasa imun dan spirit gw bertambah dengan kaya gini. You do you. JANGAN NGATUR.

My apology again, but that is just so stupid in my personal opinion.. Kita dianugerahkan akal dan anggota tubuh untuk digunakan sebaik-baik nya.. Kalo gak digunain itu namanya mubazir.

At least I never use my fingers to Julid the celebrity and never did an useless fighting on whatsapp group or in comment column. This is not Julid nor comment, it called SPEAK UP! Find the differences please peeps.

I rarely see (or maybe I just don't know) the nowadays so called celebrity aka influencer sharing about this matter. Or maybe there are, but I just don't know it, because my knowledge of celebrity is very limited and I'm too lazy to do a research for this kind of thing. Is it possible if they save themselves first from being dislike? and oh you know what? I don't give a shit about that.. What is right is right..

I do realized that some celebrity and famous peeps do the their part  with made a huge donation, rise the charity, virtual donation concert and many more. But until when to be exact? Only God knows. No, I don't mean to blame them or anyone, if we need someone to be blame there is no one other than ourselves. If we the citizens don't stop the spread of the virus, I believe it can occur forever.

On another hand, probably just my another 50 cent, people who went around to the super crowded mall (department store) and  traditional public market don't know if there are tons of online stores around us. They have a promo as well, just like in the mall. They also sell vegetables, rice and many things. Peeps who went to an airport and to a junk food restaurant for a very stupid non sense reason maybe have zero access to information and technology. ((Yes I am just being sarcastic here)). I think they are just a new generation of an era, Covidiot.

I wish I can make an open letter to Mr. #1, but at this point I'm sure he doesn't even care anymore with his people's thought. He Just don't care with how his people will feel and react. Oh I just remember that I have the media to make an useless open letter.

What I'm trying to say in here.. If our leader can't take care of us, we are the one who have the responsibility to take care of ourselves and our beloved ones. If everyone can do that I believe the virus can slow the speed down from spreading.. STOP BEING A CARRIER!

My prayers goes to all medical team, all of them, the one who works in the first line and in the end of the line. The ones who work without prejudice. Works with heart, sincerity, affectionate and many other good things that idk.. They took an oath so they need to obey as well.. But actually they can run away from it if they are shameless and don't have something that we usually called HUMANITY.

Last one, I don't  want to leave behind my appreciation to the Journalist who still working with passion and sincerity. Keep the spirit up and always give us the true news.

GOOD LUCK!  May the peace be upon you!

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